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December 03, 2009

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nato

Thought of another way: We are all always deeply flawed, so the best that can be said about us on our own terms (rather than in comparison to others) is that we are striving toward the good. If we make any significant progress in that direction, we necessarily must see who we were as painful. So much better that it be chagrin for virtue not yet gained than regret for good qualities since lost. I don't really miss the blithe optimism that characterized certain eras of my life because the me of then strikes me as so clumsy and prone to destruction (relatively speaking), like a happily inebriated driver.


On another note, congrats to your sister and on your own unclehood. I especially enjoy nieces and nephews of a certain age where you can have fun with them for hours, hand them back to their parents when they're exhausted and possibly dirty, and their parents thank you for it! It's the perfect racket.

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That's unknowable, but I think it's quite possible, for her character changed for the worse because of what happened later.

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I seem since to have lost. I believe-- for hope is one of the Christian virtues-- that such joy can be restored, even surpassed, by the grace of God, and in the meantime there is nothing for it but to "wait on the Lord." But should we not remember God's gifts with gratitude, even when we have spoiled them?

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That's unknowable, but I think it's quite possible, for her character changed for the worse because of what happened later.

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I suppose "judge not that ye be not judged" ought to apply to one's past selves as well as to other people, once those past selves are far enough in the past. I can leave off condemning. I just feel pity for him, ignorant of the transience of his happiness.

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Their somewhat innocently illicit beginnings would then have been little more than a detail. Would they have been happy? That's unknowable, but I think it's quite possible, for her character changed for the worse because of what happened later.

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Anyway, I suppose "judge not that ye be not judged" ought to apply to one's past selves as well as to other people, once those past selves are far enough in the past. I can leave off condemning. I just feel pity for him, ignorant of the transience of his happiness.

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I've gotten used to the feeling of putting back together the pieces of a broken life and feeling contented with something that's a bit makeshift and unsatisfactory. But to repent is to pass judgment on one's past self, and at some point one's past self becomes almost like a different person, so that thoughts of how bad one was become not a penitent but a bitter and censorious emotion.

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great! A honeymoon ought to come after a wedding-- that was highly unwise and dangerous; but it might easily have happened that the young man and the young woman who fell in love.

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